There is so many stories just from the last several days but the best one was from yesterday. I had to share it. I’ll try not to give all the intricate details but do want to set the stage for the climax of where our family was at when yesterday happened. 

Almost done unloading the truck from yesterday.

At the end of last week we pulled away from Minnesota and went from living in one basement to living in another. We were excited to be in KC for this next season. The next day I got hit hard with allergies or sickness or both. Over the next several days our entire family got sick as well. We are all sick at the moment. This morning I couldn’t get out of bed, which isn’t usually me even when I am sick. My body just screamed, “STOP!” and I couldn’t do anything. All I remember is Arden telling me some story while beckoning for a response and Eliana on top of me, riding me like a horse. I felt kinda delirious. 

So yesterday was a big day for us because we had checked out an apartment that was fairly cheap, been approved to take over the last 3 months of a lease and were ready to move in. Even though we all had got pretty sick and I had been up every 15 minutes the night prior with Arden, we awoke with a fatigued excitement, got ready, cleaned up and jumped in the truck. 

After doing transition for as long as we have been, we’ve learned to prep the kids for what is ahead. But this one we did with an amped up intensity because they would be stationary for longer than a month and be able to run in circles in our new home versus the straight line that they were limited to in the RV.

SIDE NOTE: We have learned that transition can be incredibly tough on younger ones, no matter the age. Many console with the statement, “They’ll be fine. Kids are so resilient.” I know there to be truth in that statement but after going through this last season, it isn’t as consoling. 

We arrived at our soon-to-be apartment complex, opened the door to our particular building and walked through a cloud of smoke to get to our front door. In the excitement, tiredness, etc I don’t think we gave it much thought. After we connected with the previous tenant, I started to unload the truck. Just to add, the apartment we were seeking to move into had been occupied by non-smokers and very sweet believers in the Lord. 

As soon as the previous tenant left, Grace shut the windows, kicked on the A/C and started to sort through what I was bringing in. I had completely unbungeed the truck and was committed to the moving process. Not long after that we began to smell a faint smell of smoke in the apartment. As I went from outside to inside it began to smell more and more like a non-smoking room at a hotel that had once been a smoking room. We knew that with a baby on the way, that was “a hill we would die on.” We hadn’t realized that tenants could smoke freely in the building/apartments and that the A/C ducts were connected to all the other apartments. The previous visit we had smelt nothing. However, we realized that smoking neighbors had not been at home and the previous tenants liked it hot and rarely kicked on the A/C. Our thinking had defaulted to a smoke-free environment when it came to apartment complexes. 

So, after asking a lot of questions, kicking the A/C on high for 20 more minutes, we knew it was time to repack what we had unpacked and try to find housing again.  I will never forget Arden’s repeated statement, “Daddy, I just want to stay here.” Did I mention that the apartment complex had a pool. 

At this point we knew that it was not an option to try and temporarily unbungee the large tarp on the back of our truck again, move back into someone’s basement and live like we were on the road” still. To sum up our next hours, there were tears, screaming as the kids stayed strapped in their seats, frustration and crying out for His grace. Did I mention we were all sick and coughing until we almost puked. :) To sum it up we laid some options out there, cried in front of some people and landed in an apartment with just our family for at least a few weeks. 

Relaxing after a long day of moving

This story gives you a flavor of our families journey over the past month’s. We wouldn’t trade it for a second! Hopefully we can communicate the “why” of that last statement, over these next months while we somewhat settle.

Mercy isn’t void of suffering and pain. In fact, we have found that the greatest mercy is bathed in it. 

I want to preface this post with the two links describing why and what we are doing in this season. They will help to better understand some of the things I bring up in this post if you have not already read them. 

“What” Update

“Why” Update

As of right now, excluding the miles driving around the cities we land in, we have driven 6,845 miles. We have approximately 2 more months of living in our current RV and fulfilling what the Lord shared with us while in Duluth. Within that time we will travel at least 2800 more miles depending on where the Lord leads us, seeing many more RV Parks and meeting many more people.

All that the Lord has done in us over the last 7000(+) miles is hard to put into words but I have tried at little open moments along the way through my blog (and will continue to). Time and routine have been extremely tough with constant transition, thus leaving “blogging” as a limited thing in my time management. Yet, we are trying our best to capture moments along the way.  I wish we had more time to put it all into words but this lifestyle doesn’t give the luxury of that most the time.

For instance, I am currently at the laundry mat spending around $15 to get my clothes clean. Boy do I miss having my own washer and dryer. :) And this is one of the few moments where I can sit and type away.

I want to share something with you all.

One morning, around a month ago, when we were still in Portland, Oregon, I was talking to the Lord about our finances. It is a constant occurrence and I check-in often around that subject. This time there was a specific sense I felt the Lord nudging me with related to our income. It seemed like a simple statement but had significant “heat” behind it in my time of listening. It had to do with Him giving us a creative idea related to what we are doing for these few months on the road.

Well, I listened some more but did not hear any “creative idea” that He might have to give. I wasn’t discouraged by the lack of hearing anything but just continued on with my day.  Later that day I got a phone call out of the blue from a friend that I do not get consistent calls from and he had no clue where we were at financially. He said that he had been praying for us as a family and that he had a creative idea he felt the Lord had possibly given him as he prayed related to us. I immediately knew that this was what the Lord had been nudging me about before I ever heard his idea. Our friend then proceeded to share it with me.

The basic gist of the idea had to do with asking people to financially sponsor our family for a day. To compile our basic costs for a month and then break it down to a daily cost in order for someone or a family to sponsor us for one day.

Now it was over a month ago (right before we left Portland) that we heard this from the Lord but have been asking Him as to when we should present it.  During this crazy journey of traveling and learning as a family we have never asked for money. It was never our intention to do so but yet here we are feeling as though this is a simple way to be obedient to what the Lord shared with us over a month ago.

In some ways it has been a really tough process calculating our monthly costs because of the differing dynamics wherever we go. For example, in Portland and Texas we used a lot of propane to stay warm because of the cold weather that followed us (costing around $20 every 3 or 4 days). But now that we are in North Carolina, that cost has dropped significantly. However, there are new things that show up depending on where we land and what RV Park we are at. For example, when we started this journey, we were paying around $3.60 for a gallon of diesel gas. Here in North Carolina the cheapest I can find around me is $4.15 a gallon.  However, diesel has still been the cheaper choice in the long run due to it’s gas mileage and the rise in unleaded gas as well.

With all that said, Grace and I have narrowed down that one day conservatively costs around $50. That DOES NOT include the massive gas cost when we travel over long distances. We factored in food ($300), rv park costs ($450), gas around town ($400), travel trailer rental ($100), propane ($50), laundry ($30) and other misc. costs like truck and travel trailer maintenance or repair.

So how can you give if you feel led? On the right column of my blog you can see a Paypal button where you can give in a secure way. Giving that way does come with a small fee for Grace and I. However, if you have a Paypal account you can give through your paypal straight to my email address with no fee.  Also, you can send anything to our current snail mail address:

1129 Graceland Dr.
Aztec, NM 87410

At this point we have no way of providing tax deduction for any money that is given. We are working on this for the long run.

We also have posted a calendar on the right column of my blog to give you an idea of what days we have sponsored over the next few months and what days we don’t.

There have been many who have asked what the heck we are doing as we travel. The answers vary depending on what city we are in but I wanted to give just one testimony from Portland. 

In a previous post I briefly mentioned a man by the name of John. He has been waiting for a heart transplant. Months ago he was required to move close to the Portland area based on the need for close proximity if a heart were to become available for transplant. As a result he bought a little travel trailer and was forced to temporarily leave his wife and country home behind as he began to patiently wait for a new heart. Six months later we met him in Portland still waiting for a new heart. His wife does come often to see and stay with him, along with his little dog but there is a lot of open time in between their visits that has created significant loneliness for John. 

Let me give a few details to set the stage. They might sound a little random at first but bare with me.

When Grace and I arrived in Portland, I was ready to tackle whatever the Lord asked of us. My desire was to possibly plant a little house church at the rv park.  But I didn’t quite expect to tackle one thing He laid before me. Across the street was a Starbucks coffee and I knew quickly (per the Lord) that I was to spend each morning in that one location, studying the Word and listening to Him. 

If you know me, then you know that I like to skip around when it comes to getting coffee. And I certainly don’t make coffee shops an everyday experience based on my budget. But I did find a way to temper the cost of spending each day at Starbucks and consistently arrived each morning at 6am. 

Also, at our rv park there was a community room set up for functions or just every day hanging out. The first Sunday in Portland, we as a family went over and worshipped in that room. Towards the end of our worship time a man (John) came in and began to walk on the treadmill.  Then as my next week went on, I realized that the same man came into Starbucks every morning like I did. 

Long story short, we met and began to talk and hang out each morning. Our family was able to love on John in different ways throughout our time there. And even though he did not know Jesus, he still would let us pray often over him in Jesus’ name. 

The moment I am wanting to highlight came right at the end of my time in Portland. As many of you know, right before we left Portland we made a very last minute, quick visit to North Carolina. Grace and the kids flew to New Mexico with grandma and grandpa while I flew back to Portland to make the long drive to pick them up on our way to Texas. 

On the plane ride back to Portland I knew that I was to give John my Bible when I returned. In the midst of being prompted by the Lord, I thought to myself, “Why are you just now thinking of that?! You should have done that earlier.” But the timing of my gift became powerful. 

Not long after arriving back in Portland, John stopped by our rv to give me his contact information. Shortly into our conversation John began to weep and I held him as he cried. He tried to give a tough exterior at first but quickly “melted.” I knew that it was time to give him the Bible and pray with him one last time. I don’t have words to describe that moment but it leaves me crying each time I think about it and even while I now type. John stood there grasping my Bible tightly with tears streaming down his face and saying with conviction that he would read it. May the message of God’s restoration of all things through the Messiah Jesus continue to echo in him and enlighten his eyes.  May the Lord give him a new heart physically and spiritually. 

We as a family walked away from our time in Portland with many different moments of ministry that presented themselves in our everyday life. John was one of those. 

Currently we are in North Carolina and have a middle-aged unmarried couple living next to us. I don’t want to say to much at this point but they definitely don’t know Jesus and we would appreciate prayer for them. We started hanging with them from day one and are loving them as the Lord leads. 

Uncertainty seems to quickly reveal whether you really trust the Lord or just give lip service. Boy how I have failed to trust Him during this time on the road. Uncertainty brings crisis and crisis calls upon something to lean on. Trials and tribulations aren’t supposed to be a foreign concept for those who believe in Jesus as their Messiah. That is the natural outcome of this fallen age if we choose to follow the One we call Lord. Just read the Word of God which testifies to that fact through many individual lives. It is in those trials where we have the opportunity to shine as a witness for Him. Not through striving in and of ourselves, glorying in what we can do and how we can prosper. No, it is in laying down ourselves through carrying our cross in humility. Considering others better than ourselves, loving well in the pressures, especially when the world would tell you to put all the focus on yourself during the time you are in. In those times, the spirit of this age would validate complaint or striving in the name of struggle. But let us resist the flesh and walk according to the Spirit, for it is through prayer that we access grace in the Spirit to walk worthy.  I have found for myself that decent size struggles reveal whether I actually believe the theology coming off my lips. 

For my entire adult life until about 2 years ago, I was incredible at making sure life was comfortable for the most part (in control of all the outcomes) while maintaining a “faith-filled” appearance as a believer. Beneath the exterior I cringed at the slightest hint of uncertainty when it came to life. In one significant time with the Lord (and many small ones) I realized that I had been through 0 significant-sized crisis in my life.  My heart hadn’t been really tested outside what boundaries I had set up or could expect or control. And if it had in some small way, I was quick to make sure it didn’t happen again without me knowing it was coming. I knew on the inside through times with Him that I hadn’t allowed the Lord to move in my life the way that He desired to. Routine and planning was my security blanket and I didn’t make allowance for major shifting based on the Lord’s pursuit of my heart reality through the leadership of the Spirit. I always was 15 minutes early to meetings in order to cut off any possible trouble before it could turn major. I worked hard to not feel uncomfortable, all the while creating my own shakings for the sake of reputation, so that I could expect them and be prepared to face them. My life was calculated (manipulated many times) even when it came to hearing from the Lord. What looked like major faith on my part in the eyes of others, was a “well oiled Richee-machine” that had worked hard to administrate most every major problem out of any life experience. The Spirit was a mere talking point of my Christian faith instead of the reality by which my life was led and sustained unto being born again into the Messiah’s Kingdom at Jesus’ return. My boast was in me and my abilities to overcome the obstacles I had intentionally placed in front of me. 

I say all that based on several experiences that we as a family have faced over the past several weeks. I hope to lay out some of the story in the near future but traveling, mixed with plain old life, has not afforded me many opportunities lately to blog. 

Hopefully one of my next posts will document the events and give some insight into some of the uncertainties and/or pressures that we have faced. They are very small in comparison to the trials that a majority of humanity on the earth faces day-to-day. And that is just it. I have failed along the way in the smallest of trials, forgetting the Spirit’s purpose in my lives at times (to grant grace in hard times). And at other times crying out in prayer as a family and experiencing His grace beyond words. 

Mercede and Family

Yesterday (February 13, 2012) we received some news that we had been dreading.  Our 9 year old niece Mercede (Grace’s side of the family) had passed away after an intense battle with leukemia. On June 9, 2011, Mercede Joy was diagnosed with Acute Monoblastic Leukemia(m5). She fought the aggressive cancer with courage and (for the most part) a smile on her face. She was supposed to go through five rounds of chemo and then be able to go home and get on with life. However, two days after Christmas, at the end of her fifth round of chemo, the news came that the leukemia was back and her bone marrow was 70% cancer cells. We had planned on seeing Mercede and the family in a few months as we passed through North Carolina but now we will have to wait to see her. :’( The little time Grace and I were able to spend with her in the past was so special to us. 

Another point of reference pertaining to death has to do with a man we have met at our RV Park here in Portland. His name is John and he lives near us and is awaiting a new heart. He is on the list for a heart transplant at the hospital here in Portland and has to live within a certain distance of the hospital at all times. As a result he no longer is at his country home hours south of the city, is away from his wife and has a travel trailer similar to ours at our little RV Park. He’s been here for 6 months and he does not know how long till the transplant will be. Each morning I see and talk to John at the nearby coffee shop and last night our family was able to take him out for dinner.  He has almost died several times over the years and it is on his mind at times. 

Death is not the funnest conversation to have or the best topic of a blog post. But death is a reality that can humble the most driven man in all his pursuits and can create an incredible platform for the good news of the coming Messianic Kingdom. Until Jesus returns, death will be a consistent reality set in place to remind us of some things. 

Though it seems a bit strange, the subject of death has been a sobering encouragement to me. It serves as a reminder of the second death that will come to some (Gehenna/lake of fire) and is a motivator to live this vapor of a life in full submission to God’s leadership by the Spirit unto entrance into the Messiah’s Kingdom (eternal life/salvation/being born again). 

It is in the heart of many to control all aspects of life, but humanity throughout history has faced death and lost every time…except for One…Jesus! Death cannot be controlled but can be overcome. But in order to overcome, we must lose all control of this life and trust Him with it.

Each weekday morning while living here in Portland, I have consistently visited the Starbucks across the street where I have had the opportunity to talk with some and see many others. This particular Starbucks serves many wealthy business men and women. There is an air of confidence and control that comes from most who enter to get their coffee. Many talk of their “inner strength” which helps them to succeed in this life and overcome. But for all of them there is a day approaching where their heart will stop beating, their lungs will stop breathing and they will face the One who did overcome. Will they have lived with that day in mind? Will their self-will, self-distraction, self-trust have made a legacy in this life but prepared the way for second death in the next age? Which is better? 

The first death is pretty certain for all who now live. It is one of the few things that people cannot fully control. And there is only one Man who has overcame death through resurrection (Jesus the Messiah). The prophets and mouthpieces for all other religions have faced death and lost. The question is, will we face the second death and lose? Life is busy and sometimes causes a fog to settle over the priority list but wouldn’t it make sense to look to the One who has overcome the one thing that all humanity has never been able to control. It’s interesting how so many can try to avoid death, yet never look to the One who overcame it. 

Death can help to encourage us on the Narrow Path as we journey toward the New Jerusalem (age to come), serving as a tool for humility and countering pride…if we stop to ponder it.

Grace and I have recently been reading the book If Jesus Were A Parent by Hal Perkins.  What a great book to refocus us as parents in the midst of all the transition that has happened over the last year.  In just 11 months we have moved around 5 times, went from filling half of a 25 foot UHaul truck to the brim with all our stuff (we shared the Uhaul with another family), to fitting it in the back of a pick-up truck. All the while traveling at least 4,644 miles between all the places we have been. And we still have approximately 5,700 miles to travel in the next 4 months.  

If you are a parent you know that it doesn’t take much to know your shortcomings while attempting to raise children.  Well, for us, that has been magnified beyond what we have ever experienced in the midst of all the transition we have recently been through. Feeling vision one moment in how to raise our children while wrestling with failure in our hearts the next. However, one thing that has stayed steady is our yearning for our children to have a reality that Jesus is the Messiah, what that actually means and it’s implications on their lives now based on expectations of His return.

Many of you know and have heard us talk of a children’s curriculum, children’s Bible founded on Messianic expectation and even children’s songs. It all started in October of 2009 during a prayer retreat where I could not get off the floor weeping for hours and the Lord blindsided me around the subject of children. It hasn’t wained since and remains alive to this day.  All of that continues to be at the forefront of our hearts but the Lord had a much different timetable than we thought by which to birth whatever it is that He has for us in all that. The old Richee would have whipped something right up in my own doing without God’s leadership along the way. From my past experiences in ministry I have learned that a lot can be produced by men’s effort and intuition “for the Lord” (just look at Babel) but account for nothing in the eyes of the Lord and even be detestable to Him. 

It is imperative that we constantly realize that God knows our heart reality better than anyone and to trust His leadership with it. Apart from that, we will be led astray by the deception that we know what is best, act on it and then pat ourselves on the back following it. I have been learning over the last few years that I’m not as great as I had made myself out to be and it was all a product of trusting myself with my life decisions and not the Lord. Busyness and distraction; perceived success and praise from others had deceived me into habits and ways of thought that kept me from patience, long-suffering and just about every fruit of the Spirit. And that is just it!! In my past I agreed with the language that described who the Spirit is and what He does but He wasn’t actively leading my life. 

As we have read If Jesus Were A Parent I have been so thankful for God’s tender leadership and have realized that He knows the best timing for all that needs to come forth. I await His “go ahead” on it all. I now strongly know that the Lord doesn’t want something that makes good behavioral children, but something that causes Jesus’ Messiahship to be more real than anything they can experience in this life. My heart has been sparked in so many areas related not only to my own children but to other parents and their children as we have traveled and had the privilege of experiencing so many incredible families. Little by little we are learning how to incorporate Jesus into everyday life of family without it becoming a fairytale, joke or taking a back seat to all the trinkets that children get thrown at them by the spirit of this age.  

By the grace of the Spirit, I am reminded daily at how important it is to walk by the Spirit and live the cross before my children. Do I save them? Nope. I am their hope? Nope. However, who I am directly affects who they are. I have a long ways to go but I am more passionate now than ever at how important it is to authentically be able to say to my child(ren), “Follow me as I follow Christ.” Where I live with a real faith for the Day of the Lord, His return and all that comes with that, allowing it to echo into every nook and cranny of our lives. Without that, Jesus will easily take a back seat in the hearts of our children and leave them as detached from Him as any unbelieving peer they might link arms with. When crisis comes and things shake, may they not run to fear, complaint, offense, whining, material possessions, food, etc. But may they know You and trust You in such a way that their first response leads to You, thus leading those around them to the same place. 

Bottom line for me is that I desire to hold the physical hand of my children after receiving our resurrected bodies at the Day of Jesus’ appearing and to walk on this earth in perfection right beside them. That doesn’t just happen automatically and I realize that the love of many believers is going to, and already is, growing cold while times become harder in many ways but especially when it comes to walking in righteousness. I have little disciples among me who will either enter His Kingdom or be placed in Gehenna. That is a reality that I try to remember daily.

I am more convinced now than ever that parenting ranks pretty stinkin high on God’s priority list.

Help us Lord by your Spirit as we parent. It’s only by your grace and leadership. Thank you for your patience and long-suffering.

He went away from there and came to his hometown, and his disciples followed him. And on the Sabbath he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were astonished, saying, “Where did this man get these things? What is the wisdom given to him? How are such mighty works done by his hands? Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary and brother of James and Joses and Judas and Simon? And are not his sisters here with us?” And they took offense at him. And Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor, except in his hometown and among his relatives and in his own household.” And he could do no mighty work there, except that he laid his hands on a few sick people and healed them. And he marveled because of their unbelief. And he went about among the villages teaching. Mark 6:1-6 ESV

I read over this passage the other day and was marveling at the fact that Jesus marveled. In other versions words like amazed and astonished are used. There is another account in Matthew 5:8 where Jesus marvels at the extent of the centurion’s faith. 

Isn’t it interesting to think that Jesus, the Son of God, the Messiah marveled. And at what did he marvel? 

First off, I think it is so important to understand what it meant for Jesus to be the Messiah in the hearts of those in His day. The Messiah, in simple terms, was the One that would come, restore all things and sit as King over restored creation forever.  It wasn’t a small thing and that is why He hacked so many off when He would allude to the fact that He was THAT GUY! 

With that said, I have no doubt that throughout the New Testament “faith” is not just believing that I can be healed. Faith was far bigger than that in the Jewish mind. Faith was anchored in the Messianic expectation. Do I really believe that this guy is the One who will come and restore all things? Is this really the guy who will sit on the throne in the New Jerusalem and govern perfectly forever? Is this really God’s Son? Is this the Guy that will judge the heart of every man?

The reason healing is the context around which we see faith mentioned a lot is because signs and wonders were a clear indicator and sign of the Messiah and His Kingdom that would come to the earth at the Day of the Lord and gave hope of the coming restoration. The body being healed pointed to the resurrection of the body at the coming of the Messiah. A sample of what is to come and to remind those receiving or seeing the healing that He is going to come and restore the body fully. It wasn’t belief in the healing as much as faith in the One who the healing pointed to. Healings, casting out demons, signs, wonders all are STILL meant to point to the coming Day of the Lord, when the Messiah will return and restore His creation.  

So, when Jesus marvels at these two accounts in the gospels, the reality of His Messiahship gives great depth to what is being said. Those in Jesus’ home town knew Him in His obscurity and “hidden” years. Their questions in Mark 6 have unspoken answers that point to Him as Messiah, yet they discount faith in Him as the Messiah by pointing to His family and siblings. In that, they are offended, leaving them faithless. 

Their is much discussion around faith here in the West. Many thoughts are given to faith (like mine), but each believer must really grapple with the Jewish understanding of faith and what it meant to a Jew because it would mean the same thing for us as Gentiles as well. His Messiahship can change a lot in Scripture if it is understood rightly. 

Truly, we are saved through faith. The Spirit was given that we might access His grace in prayer (through healing, prophecy, long suffering, etc), reminding us of the still coming Day of the Messiah (stirring faith) and being strengthened to walk worthy unto that end (persevering). 

Forgetfulness is demonstrated throughout the Old Testament in the nation of Israel. We now have no excuse to forget with the Spirit dwelling in us. The Spirit makes relationship with God available to us. Nonetheless, we do forget at times. Thank you Lord for your mercy and may You and Your Day be a real reality that shapes every day of our lives. 

May the Spirit lead us each day and may we continue to have a reality anchored in the Messiah and His Day, picking up our cross as He did that we might live (in the resurrection) when He returns.

Our RV Park In Portland

Since picking up our newest home in Minnesota several weeks ago, a 29 foot travel trailer, we have experienced little sunlight.  As we traveled across the northern states of the U.S. we encountered a blizzard in Montana, significant winds in Idaho, freezing rain and ice in eastern Oregon before finally arriving in our current location of Portland.  To say it mildly, it was quite a journey with many obstacles in getting to our destination.  And since being in Portland it has rained almost every day, revealing a leak in our trailer through drips on our heads in the night.  I’ve never looked at the Weather Channel as much as I have over the past few weeks. :)

The interesting part is how the literal weather can cause a “storm” upon the insides of any person. Just ask those in New Orleans, Haiti and Japan. The pressures of crisis, whether small or big, can reveal a lot about a nation, city or person.

Grace and I knew that this year would be a time of significant testing which it certainly has been in many different ways. Constant transition, saying goodbye to possessions that had gripped our hearts beyond what they should have, at times feeling alone, seeing our selfishness in the midst of parenting and much more.  

After landing here in Portland I have had a little bit of time to look back over the last months and be filled with thanksgiving over what I have seen the Lord do in our family. We have seen His graciousness and mercy through the different inward and outward trials we experienced. Though tough at times, we know it is working in us an eternal weight of glory. He grants grace through His Spirit dwelling in us as we ask and we know He truly is preparing us for the Day of the Lord.    

What My Family Looked Like As We Drove Across The North...Chickens

As a family we are learning this year through the Lord’s guidance that it is important to “enter the storm” and not divert from it.  It is important because it humbles us, sends us to the Lord in prayer and allows us to see the beauty that He alone can bring following the cleansing rain of each storm.

This year in our family’s life was initiated by the Lord. We knew that at the least (or at the most) it had the simple purpose of preparing us for the Day of the Lord. Our salvation is being worked out with fear and trembling in many ways and we desire to be “born again” in the resurrection of our bodies at the birth of the new age.  

For those thinking we are on a vacation, I assure you, we are not. Try uprooting your life, letting go of the 9-5 schedule, any security you might have had and living day-to-day on the Lord’s leading. Some might read that and think “YES!”, what are you talking about?!  Trust me, it isn’t a vacation…especially for me who had OCD around my schedule and routine. Probably one of the most significant areas of testing is finances.  Trusting the Lord instead of making our own plans from a place of anxiety and fear…basically living in sin.

Driving Through The Canyon Before Getting To Portland

Let me end with what I read this morning in Mark 4:35-41. Jesus slept on a cushion at the stern of the boat during a significant storm. That alone can serve as our incredible Example! We all know the story…Jesus calms the storm, asks some significant questions of the disciples as they stand in awe of who He is. Here are the questions that we too must ponder as we no longer seek to side-step the storms of life with our comfortable back doors of escape (entertainment, complaint, material possessions, reputation, etc.).

 He said to them, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?” Mark 4:40

Should the Church in politically or socially trying circumstances remain covert to avoid potential eradication by forces hostile to Christianity? Or would more open confrontation with prevailing spiritual ignorance and deprivation–even if it produced Christian martyrs–be more likely to lead to evangelistic breakthroughs? Islamic fundamentalists claim that their spiritual revolution is fueled by the blood of martyrs. Is it conceivable that Christianity’s failure to thrive in the Muslim world is due to the notable absence of Christian martyrs? And can the Muslim community take seriously the claims of a Church in hiding? . . . The question is not whether it is wise at times to keep worship and witness discreet, but rather how long this may continue before we are guilty of hiding our light under a bushel. . . The record shows that from Jerusalem and Damascus to Ephesus and Rome, the apostles were beaten, stoned, conspired against and imprisoned for their witness. Invitations were rare, and never the basis for their missions.

George Otis Jr., The Last of the Giants: Lifting the Veil on Islam and the End Times (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Chosen, 1991), 261, 263.

Arden and I getting ready for our morning prayer room time as a family.

It has been several years now that we as a family began asking the Lord to reshape our hearts and lives to look like disciples of Him (Jesus) versus spectators for Him, who have a language and theology around Him with very little reality of Him in our lives.  Prior to that time many of our inner motives and outer actions were unto glorifying or protecting ourselves while maintaining an outer perception of holiness.

NOTE: I have blogged extensively on this in the past but wanted to quickly summarize it again for those who are seeing it for the first time. One blog series that goes more in depth is “Exposing of a Pharisee…Me”.

CONT….For me personally, the Lord ripped off significant blinders of pride from my eyes and revealed, in detail, major issues of jealousy, envy, anger, rage and the list goes on. It wasn’t just a one time encounter where I felt a little bad, repented and then moved on. No…I had trained my inner motives with efficiency, to pursue self-interest in almost every encounter I had with people.  I had shaped the extrovert, charismatic side of who I was to exploit the smallest of situations and exalt myself in whatever sly way I could.  And the worst part was that I didn’t see my own blindness but actually justified and validated it through Christian jargon.  The depth of insight the Lord gave about my heart reality sent me to my knees in some serious humility and led to major shifts in our family over time.  The Lord had me take several steps back from any platform leadership, knowing the distraction and idolatrous investment I had given to it in the past.

As a result of God’s mercy in revealing the filth that I had nurtured for so long, there was a deep, gut wrenching understanding of my brokenness as a human and the deep need for Him to lead me to the cross by His Spirit. In His tenderness and through many tearful prayers, God has been uprooting many things and sanctifying my life through the means of strengthening me to take up my cross daily while keeping the hope of His return in sight.  The process continues as I keep Jesus before my eyes through the Word of God and prayer.

With all that said it wasn’t until I realized the depth, capability and blindness of wickedness I had been living in, as well as receiving His mercy, tenderness and seeing His patience toward me, that I understood the dynamic love of Jesus on the cross, the high calling to follow His example and suffer, how repulsive wickedness is to Him and how that defines the Biblical “end game”.  For way too long I had minimized the reality of sin in context to my life and classified most of who I was as being “pretty good” based on outward living while my inner life was filthy and comforted by self-righteousness.  I had deceived myself and was like some of the priests of the Word who would see themselves as self-righteous in doing the duty of the law (while inwardly living sinfully) and bringing a sacrifice to fill in the gaps. (Malachi)  

And so much of what God has done in us came in context to Him redefining our theology in the Word through the place of prayer.  Revelation around the cross, the Holy Spirit and the Day of the Lord shook Grace and I to the point of causing significant “tremors” in our everyday life. We became sick of just talking theology and debating philosophy while it changed nothing but the information and thoughts of our brain.  Basically, it rarely or barely drove us to love but primarily strengthened and bolstered pride, driving us to trust in the opinions of men.

With all that said, we know that this year holds varying layers of things for our family to grow in but overall is about us learning to follow the leadership of the Spirit while gazing on the life of Jesus.  Allowing Him to lead us “to the cross” just as He did with Jesus (which I will be probably be blogging about in the future) and seeing Him move in power for the purpose of bearing witness to the coming Day of the Lord. 

For years we have had such a hunger to walk according to the Spirit and not just talk about the things of the Spirit.  As our theology became more than just a label and the truth of the Word gripped us day in and day out to the point of shifting certain life functions, we were confronted by the Lord in so many ways and God has led us to this point. Over the course of this season, Grace and I aim to blog around the Word in relation to some of the things I am mentioning in this post. 

Simply, God is teaching us how to be sojourners in this age through the leadership of His Spirit. We know that our journey is unique and not for every family, but is necessary for where the Lord is leading us. Yes, we know that this season in our lives seems a bit crazy to some but we can’t sidestep His leadership. We did that for way too long under the umbrella of ministry and so many other things. There is a mountain of uncertainties ahead of us but we desire to “come up leaning upon our Beloved” as a family.  We know that when this year of traveling ends there will be plenty more for the Lord to do in us, but we do know that this time is significant to what the Lord might do through our family in the future. 

We want to ask for prayer.  Even if it is just right now and only is a few words.  We ask for prayer.  Not that our journey would be comfortable or logistically flawless.  But that the Lord would give us grace and strengthen us by His Spirit to rejoice and give thanks even in the midst of whatever trials may come as He prepares us for the Day of His return.  If you feel as though the Lord has spoken to you something specific for us, please don’t hesitate to share it if you feel you should.